Some friendships pick up exactly where they left off, no matter how much time has passed. And some of those friendships also happen to come with a front-row seat to watching someone build something extraordinary.
A Villanova Friendship, Then a Long Pause
Many years ago, Alison and I were very good friends at Villanova. We were both communications majors, took plenty of classes together, partnered on projects, and shared the kind of campus life that makes you really know someone. Even back then, I could tell from Ali’s work ethic that she was going to do great things after graduation and go far in life.
Then graduation came, life happened, and we lost touch for a stretch. (Honestly, a new phone wiping out my contacts certainly did not help). Over the years I would think of her and wonder where her path had taken her. Was she still in broadcast or if she perhaps have pivoted into something new?
Then about three years ago, a graduation photo of the two of us popped up in my Facebook memories. On impulse, I searched for her on Instagram to say hello and catch up.
Not only did she have an Instagram, she had built a rapidly growing brand and business around etiquette. Her content was reaching hundreds of thousands (and now millions) of people. When we reconnected, it felt like no time had passed since graduation. We picked up immediately where we left off, the way only real friendships do.
Watching a Book Come to Life
Fast forward to publication day. Was It Something I Said?: Everyday Etiquette to Avoid Awkward Moments in Relationships, Work, and Life is officially out in the world, published by HarperCollins. Watching Ali take this book from a conceived thought to a finished, beautifully written hardcover (and self-narrated audiobook!) has been genuinely impressive. Getting to celebrate with her on her big day was surreal.
So of course, I had to share my thoughts on the book itself.
What the Book Is Actually About
If you think etiquette is reserved only for fancy dinners and finishing schools, Alison will gently change your mind in the opening pages. Her core idea is that etiquette is really about kindness, respect, and emotional intelligence. It is the collection of small daily choices that shape how people feel in your presence, including yourself.
The book is the antidote to that anxious drive home from a party when you replay every interaction and wonder if you said the wrong thing. The title alone is going to feel deeply relatable to anyone who has ever done that, which is to say, everyone.
Alison draws on a fascinating career to fill these pages. She is an attorney, a former TV news anchor, and a former White House West Wing staffer who has accomplished many great things. That range of experience gives the book a depth you can feel on every page.
What Makes It Special
There are plenty of etiquette books on the market, but very few that read like a thoughtful friend walking you through real life. Was It Something I Said? gives you actual scripts and practical tools for the moments most of us fumble:
- – Starting and ending small talk without dread
- – Handling tricky topics like money, family dynamics, or meeting your partner’s parents
- – Decoding dress codes and dining etiquette across all kinds of settings
- – Navigating salary conversations with confidence
- – Recovering gracefully when you have said the wrong thing
- – Hosting in a way that makes everyone feel genuinely welcome
- – Responding to that group text (you know the one) without your stomach dropping
What I love most is that there is zero snobbery in these pages. The tone is warm, practical, and encouraging. You finish each chapter feeling more equipped rather than more self-conscious, which I think is the rarest skill an etiquette writer can have.
Alison makes you believe that you can move through your life with grace, and that grace is something you build, not something you are born with.
The best part about it all is that Alison does not have a judgmental bone in her body. If you ask her an etiquette-based question, nothing is too much or too farfetched, and she has an answer for everything. Furthermore, she doesn’t bat an eyelash or have an ounce of judgement in the presence of someone who may knowingly or unknowingly do an etiquette faux pas in her presence.
My Favorite Line From the Book:
The opening line: “If you learn nothing else from this book, do not under any circumstance ask a woman– unless you are positively, beyond a shadow of a doubt certain– If she is expecting (pregnant).”
Who Should Read It
Honestly? Everyone. But specifically:
- – Anyone stepping into a new chapter, a new job, a new relationship, or a new city
- – College graduates entering the professional world
- – Brides and grooms navigating wedding planning
- – Anyone who has ever felt unsure in a high-stakes social moment
- – Hosts, hostesses, and people who love bringing others together
- – Literally anyone and everyone
This book also makes a beautiful gift. I can already picture it tied with a ribbon and tucked into graduation cards, bridal shower presents, and birthday gifts for years to come.
A Personal Note to my Friend
Ali, watching you take this from idea to published reality has been one of the most inspiring things I have witnessed from afar. You have always had the work ethic, the warmth, and the talent. Seeing you put all of it on the page, in a way that is so unmistakably you, is something I will keep cheering for.
To everyone else reading this, do yourself a favor and grab a copy. You can find Was It Something I Said? wherever books are sold or CLICK HERE, you can hear her personally narrate her audiobook, and you can follow Alison at @elevateetiquette for daily doses of her wisdom.
Congratulations, friend. I am so proud of you. 🩷💛